SKETCH "LOG LINE" Episodes begin with President Bush confounding the masses at a weekly press conference; then he is followed behind closed doors to where he drops his "Idiot Persona" and unmasks his true identity as "The Real Bush" - a man who's brilliance would make Einstein look braindead. In Episode Two, we discover that Karl Rove is an android built and programmed by Bush.

SKETCH EXCERPT (various episodes) PRESIDENT BUSH ... NOW LOOK PEOPLE, I know you all got a lotta responses you want me to give up. I understand that. Nobody understands that better than me. But understand this: Questions are like opinions... and everybody thinks they want an asshole.. ‘till they get one... Now I just have time for 3 more questions... then I gotta meet wit’ some pretty voguish guys in The Ovary Office. * * * DONALD RUMSFELD Wait, Sir. Don’t we have to-- (RUMSFELD KNOCKS PAPERCLIP HOLDER OFF DESK, SPLILLING PAPER CLIPS EVERYWHERE) THE REAL BUSH We don’t have to do anything. You have to pick up... (glance-counts clips) 342 paperclips. DONALD RUMSFELD JESUS, SIR?! Are you losing it?? I just loaded this with a box of 350! Hold on, there’s 7 in the box.. No, wait, that still only makes 349. (BUSH ROLLS EYES, HOLDS UP MANILLA FOLDER WITH A PAPERCLIP ON IT) * * * PRESIDENT BUSH And keep in mind, this quote is pretty juicy. It was first said by the Reverend Martin Luther Whopper, King, Jr. And I don’t know about you, but when I hear about a quote from a civil rights kingpin like that, I get goose bumps. ... ... KELLY WALLACE - PRESS AGENT But, Mr. President-- PRESIDENT BUSH (to Kelly) Shh! Don’t interrupt your Commander in Fuhrer.. if you will.. allow me to speak in a foreign tongues for a brisk memento.. Now don’t get me wrong, Gregory, I’m also your Commander in Chief.. Peace out. THE PRESS MOB Mr. President! Mr. President!